May 4, 2013 - Commentary    No Comments

The Mysterious Concrete Slab

We’ve discovered an odd concrete slab under our grass in the backyard.  It’s 3×3′ and five inches deep.  It’s too small to be a footer for a swingset or shed, in too weird a place to be for a BBQ or light fixture, the town says there was no septic or well here, so we’re hoping for bomb shelter, Jimmy Hoffa’s grave or the secret location of the cure for the zombie plague.

Which means we need to lift the damn thing up.

So I’m looking for recommendations on how to do it, what kind of levers and fulcrums are needed, lengths, materials, etc.  So far we have four volunteers to work on it, and may have more.

Dec 24, 2012 - Commentary, Family, humor    Comments Off

My Daughter Is Vacant As a Mannequin

Kendy likes to pose with mannequins.  The first time I caught her doing it I have no idea what she was doing, just standing there next to a headless statue in the Westfield Running Shop.  Now if I don’t take a picture of her doing it she won’t move.

Yesterday we were in Old Navy and she stopped in front of these folks.  Her hand, her vacant eyes, her incredibly creepy smile are all perfect.  In fact, while I was taking the picture a guy stopped to let me take the shot, then looked down and said, “Holy crap! I thought she was one of them.”

Kendy is a an Old Navy Mannequin

Truth is I think the Old Navy Mannequins are like the weeping angels, and am afraid to look away for fear they’ll try to send me back in time to better feed off me.

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